Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.
Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.
To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you’re wrong, admit it; Whenever you’re right, shut up.
I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I’ll never see a tree at all.
Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
Middle age is when you’ve met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.
The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.
The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.
Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn’t it, of a long line of proven criminals?